Author Topic: Joke of the day 5/7  (Read 1309 times)

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Offline Reedman

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Joke of the day 5/7
« on: May 07, 2011, 09:40:08 AM »
Women Code:

1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome'. that will bring on a 'whatever').

8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F-- YOU!

9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.


Reedman

1300 gallon pond - midnight & regular shubunkins/sarassa comets/white comets/rosy red minnows.






Offline 2vetts

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Re: Joke of the day 5/7
« Reply #1 on: May 07, 2011, 10:25:52 AM »
where did you meet my wife ????? you have her vocabulary down perfectly .

Offline greenthumbnails

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Re: Joke of the day 5/7
« Reply #2 on: May 07, 2011, 12:38:58 PM »
 ;D so insightful!
My next female cat will be called "Whata Lily"!

Offline purplepshn2004

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Re: Joke of the day 5/7
« Reply #3 on: May 07, 2011, 07:48:07 PM »
 lol, that's all I will say about that!

Offline reddad35

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Re: Joke of the day 5/7
« Reply #4 on: May 07, 2011, 08:29:30 PM »
What happens if your wife says this?

Don't worry about it I am fineLoud  sigh. Go ahead and do whatever because I had nothing planned. Thats Okay my show is coming on in five minutes anyway. Thanks.

Offline Reedman

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Re: Joke of the day 5/7
« Reply #5 on: May 07, 2011, 08:42:51 PM »
redddad35,

Kiss your butt goodbye if she says that!   :swear: :boxing: :blowup: &-)
Reedman

1300 gallon pond - midnight & regular shubunkins/sarassa comets/white comets/rosy red minnows.






Offline Indiana Karen

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Re: Joke of the day 5/7
« Reply #6 on: May 08, 2011, 08:26:16 AM »
Ouch.  :thinking:

Offline ram

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Re: Joke of the day 5/7
« Reply #7 on: May 09, 2011, 09:35:39 AM »
Haha  lol us women also change our minds a lot {:-P;;

Offline SueSTx

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Re: Joke of the day 5/7
« Reply #8 on: May 09, 2011, 09:40:16 AM »
What happens if your wife says this?

Don't worry about it I am fine.  Loud  sigh. Go ahead and do whatever because I had nothing planned. Thats Okay my show is coming on in five minutes anyway. Thanks.


 {:-P;;  He's in the dog house now, He's in the dog house now, (I told him once or twice,  To quit playin' cards and a shootin' dice.  He's in the dog house now)

In The Jailhouse Now
recorded by Webb Pierce
written by Jimmie Rodgers
« Last Edit: May 09, 2011, 09:45:02 AM by SueSTx »

 

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