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The President of Iran, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, was wondering who to invade when his telephone rang.
"This is Mendel Schlepper in Tel Aviv. We're officially declaring war on you!"
"How big is your army?" the Iranian president asked.
"There's me, my cousin Moishe, Avi Goldberg and our pinochle group, Max, Larry, Jacob, Ari and Joshua!"
"I have a million in my army," said the president.
"I'll call back!" said Mendel.
The next day, he called. "The war's still on!" We have now a bulldozer, and Simcha Goldberg's tractor."
"We have 16,000 tanks, and the Iranian army is now two million men."
"Oy gevalt!" said Mendel. "I'll call back." He phoned the next day.
"We're calling off the war." Why?", asked the president.
"Well," said Mendel, "we've had a little chat and there's no way we can feed two million prisoners.”