Author Topic: Your opinion needed (Read 3156 times)

livetogarden · « **on:** February 26, 2007, 07:29:39 AM »

I could use some honest opinions please. I belong to a volunteer organization and I am on the board. My husband (Rich) was asked 2 years ago to take the website over and revamp it because the previous webmaster had abandoned it. He is very good with anything concerning computers and the president of the organization knew that which is why she asked him. He has done a wonderful job, he gets compliments often about it looking so nice (from other members as well as strangers who mail through the website). It was such a mess when he was asked to change it. The previous webmaster hadn't changed anything for ages and he started from scratch, much of the info he actually had to type in himself because no one had it on discs. Anyway...I was at a board meeting last Thursday evening. At almost the last minute of the meeting another gal who has only been a board member for about 9 months announces that her high school age daughter wants to take over the website, redesign it and work on it for the rest of the school year for her computer class. At the end of the school year she will give it back to Rich. She says "Rich won't mind, will he?" I told everyone I couldn't speak for sure for Rich but having been married to him for 32 years I didn't think he would take this news well, and really didn't think he would agree to it. He is not an unreasonable person but he loves doing the website and has worked so hard on it. When I told Rich he reacted like I thought he would. He said "If they insist on her taking it I will NOT take it back. It was a huge mess when I got it and I spent tons of time on it to get it up and looking nice I will NOT do all that work again after a high school kid who has never done a website messes with it". Well now the gal whose daughter wanted to take it over has resigned from the board because she 'got the feeling from me that I did not like her requesting this'. She is correct!!!! So....your opinions please. Were Rich and I out of line? Does what we said and did come across as unreasonable and/or improper?
Like I said, I need honest opinions. I am not going to be upset with you guys for telling me your honest thoughts, that's what I need. I want to know if I should say anything to the gal who resigned or any of the other board members? How would any of you reacted to this and what would you have done differently if you were Rich and I?
Thanks guys!!
Cath

EagleEye · « **Reply #1 on:** February 26, 2007, 07:52:38 AM »

Well, I just typed my opinion but was timed out, so here goes again.

Rich is totally reasonable and the mother of the kid is totally unreasonable.
Where does this mother get her brains from? If the rest of the group agrees that the kid should be given a chance to do this, then so be it. That is, unless you and Rich don't want it all screwed up and say so.
If the kid gets it, he is very reasonable in not taking it back.
Good luck,

Steve

CT · « **Reply #2 on:** February 26, 2007, 08:05:09 AM »

I totally agree with Steve. If the group decides to change things then they accept the responsibility for what happens. Neither of you are out of line.

-Greg- · « **Reply #3 on:** February 26, 2007, 08:08:51 AM »

Maybe Rich and the girl would be open to letting the girl come over a few nights a week to "work" on the site, she could probably learn alot from Rich, and at the same time Rich might get some satisfaction of helping out a kid. Just a thought...

Greg

livetogarden · « **Reply #4 on:** February 26, 2007, 08:17:54 AM »

Greg,
I asked the Mom if she was saying her daughter wanted to work on it with Rich. The mom said "No. She wants it to be totally her own. She wants to be able to have her name on it as the sole webmaster. She wants to revamp it and have it all be her own ideas". Rich said he would have no problem having the girl over. She could probably learn a lot from him (my thought, not Rich's) but the mom said no, she wants it to be hers alone. Rich would be totally out of the picture until the end of the school year when she would give it back to him.
Cath

Esther · « **Reply #5 on:** February 26, 2007, 08:18:07 AM »

I agree that if she is allowed to "mess" with the site that your DH should be there to supervise. The rest of the members including the darling daughter's mother have no idea what it takes to do a website and may think it is no big deal. You both do. Of course all the mother is thinking about is what her daughter wants, not what is best. If she chooses to walk away then that is her decision. "WAAAA if I can't have what I want then I won't play.."

happyoutsidegirl · « **Reply #6 on:** February 26, 2007, 08:54:40 AM »

I agree that you and Rich are correct. Let the board take a vote. If the girl messes it up Rich needs to stick to his guns.

LeeAnne151 · « **Reply #7 on:** February 26, 2007, 09:17:47 AM »

This girl can start her own website. She can do one for their family or her class at school etc. There is no reason what so ever for her to take over the website that Rich has spent years working on and being in charge of, most likely unpaid and the worst part would be that she would give it back. That is ridiculous.

This parent is way out of line.

livetogarden · « **Reply #8 on:** February 26, 2007, 09:22:54 AM »

Well so far I feel like we weren't out of line.
Leeanne...yes, Rich does this totally on a volunteer basis. He even paid for the 1st year's fee just to get a decent one going.

ladybug · « **Reply #9 on:** February 26, 2007, 02:03:50 PM »

you were completely right to react the way you did. if something should happen and the girl somehow gets to redo the website, wash your hands of it and it will be over. they don't need your husbands expertise if they are so willing to give it up for a high school who wants to do a fun project. it clearly wasn't a bowl of fun for your husband and it was insensitive of them to even consider the request from that former member.
ladybug

Teresa · « **Reply #10 on:** February 26, 2007, 02:37:33 PM »

It's absolutely ridiculous to allow a child to take over a business (even a charity business) type website. And the woman who requested that her child be allowed to take it over SHOULD resign because it was a stupid request. I really hope the other board members were behind you and your husband. They should be scared to death to have a teenager having complete control over any part of what they are responsible for.

SheilaJ · « **Reply #11 on:** February 26, 2007, 03:26:59 PM »

I agree with what everyone else has already said. She made a request, you politely declined, so now she chooses to "pack up her marbles and go home." Good riddance.

You husband spent a lot of time and effort and some money to fix it. Why should he hand it over to a total stranger, a child no less with no ties to the group, for her to play with and then return when she tires of it? Come on. Stick to your guns, you were right.

Sometimes I think volunteer organizations are worse than businesses at making a big, ugly deal out of matters that really are pretty minor. That's why I don't do PTO committees any more!

El Jefe · « **Reply #12 on:** February 26, 2007, 06:56:21 PM »

WOW talk about Deja Vu

I manage several websites as the webmaster and I can tell you that your husbands response is DEAD ON! I had a similar problem when a site I had to rebuild from scratch. The owner is a great person and a genuine christian woman. Let me say from the outset that I have nothing but respect for her. She is indeed a great person. She was going through a ton of problems personal and professional. She could no longer afford to keep the site hosted and was in danger of losing it. I talked a friend into hosting her site for free and I took over the webmaster responsibilities pro bono. I rebuilt her site and was responsible fo over 90% of the content (my own creation). She seemed happy with my work however someone at her work convinced her that they could do it better. She asked me if I would mind and I told her that it was up to her but if she decided to do it please do not ask me to take it back. She went with them and stayed with them for a few months. Shortly afterward she found out that the company was going out of business. She once again found herself in need of a server to host her site AND a webmaster. There were a ton of changes and she wanted a lot of revisions. Because we are good friends I agreed to help her but only as long as it would take her to find a place to host it and a webmaster she trusted. It took her a little time but she eventually found what she needed and I transferred everything. I know what a pain it can be to take over someone elses work make it your own and then be asked to give it up. The site is his intellectual property an as such he has every right to be upset. The board needs to realize that just because he did it for free does not make it any less work than if they had paid him, he put alot of himself into it and they should appreciate and respect that. The mother that asked for her daughter to take over the site so she could strip it and rebuild it obviously does not understand the labor of love that your husband has gone through. To make light of it say a lot about this woman. I am sure if she were to work hours upon hours on a proposal, spreadheet, database, or even redecorating a room in her house that she would not appreciate a suggestion from her bosss to scrap it and let the new guy do it nor would she want to have her husband to walk into a newly redocorated room that she slaved over and have him take a look and say the neighbors teenager thinks she could do great things with this room, lets let her strip it down and redo it, oh and you can put it back when shes done. Somehow I see him sleeping in another room because she would be livid.
If I were your husband I would save the website to my personal Machine. If the board wants the teenager to take it over fine let her, when she is done with it/bored with it your husband can offer to put the original site back up ..... At the going rate and depending on where you live that can get pricey. Sounds to me like they do not know what they have and may not appreciate it until they have to pay for it. Even if it was just this one woman they should not have even entertained that idea and you should not have been put in a position to ask your husband to do that or even entertain the idea. Her quitting may actually been a blessing in disquise..... Sorry for the rant, it kinda close to home.

livetogarden · « **Reply #13 on:** February 26, 2007, 09:20:03 PM »

El Jefe,
I did not think you ranted. I wanted opinions and appreciate them. You guys have made me feel so much better. I was hoping we didn't act immaturely and all of you have made me feel that we didn't. I just got off the phone with the organization's president (she called me to find out Rich's reaction). I told her that his reaction was........'find the kid another subject for her website, and why would you even ask for him to turn it over to an inexperienced teen?'.
Thanks everyone for your words of wisdom.

Cath

Viv · « **Reply #14 on:** February 26, 2007, 11:28:58 PM »

Cath, I agree that the mother was out of line with her request. It takes a lot of knowledge and skill to be a webmaster. Take our own site, what on earth would we have done without Sean to take care of things when they went wrong. Although in her defense, she obviously has no idea how stupid her request was.

El Jefe · « **Reply #15 on:** February 27, 2007, 06:15:54 AM »

Cath,
I cannot believe that they are even considering this, or that they put you in that position.... Are they prepared to assume any liability should she put something up there that could be considered illegal immoral or otherwise not PC? She cannot be held legally responsible but rest assured should they end up in court over something they will be. You see no good deed goes unpunished....

Andy

Teresa · « **Reply #16 on:** February 27, 2007, 07:33:08 AM »

Quote from: livetogarden on February 26, 2007, 09:20:03 PM

El Jefe,
I did not think you ranted. I wanted opinions and appreciate them. You guys have made me feel so much better. I was hoping we didn't act immaturely and all of you have made me feel that we didn't. I just got off the phone with the organization's president (she called me to find out Rich's reaction). I told her that his reaction was........'find the kid another subject for her website, and why would you even ask for him to turn it over to an inexperienced teen?'.
Thanks everyone for your words of wisdom.
Cath

So Cath, was the presidend of the board in support of Rich or fishing for this other woman? I hope the entire board is supportive of this decision.

Desertponder · « **Reply #17 on:** February 27, 2007, 07:58:14 AM »

I wouldn't lose any sleep over this. I'm sure your DH did put a great deal of work into the project and I wouldn't want it messed with either. I think this woman had a lot of balls to ask for her daughter to completely take over the website. Maybe ask if she could apprentice with him or something but asking to take it over is rather gutsy. Since the woman resigned her position after she didn't get her way this tells me she had her own personal agenda for being on the board. You guys didn't do anything wrong, this is clearly this woman's issues so I wouldn't worry about it.

livetogarden · « **Reply #18 on:** February 27, 2007, 08:13:26 AM »

Teresa,
The president called last night about some other things. Afterward she said "I didn't think Rich would mind since this is for a class grade". That's when I told her to tell the mom and the girl to pick a different subject to do a website on, but if they insisted on her doing it he WILL NOT take it back, don't even ask because he doesn't want it after a young kid has messed with it. I thought this was over with anyway because the mom resigned from the board but the president said she (pres.) was trying to convince her to reconsider. Geesh........why would anyone want a person on the board who tries to take a job from 2 people who have been members of the org. for 6 years??? On the other hand, I got an e-mail from another board member last night. She thought I knew about this beforehand and couldn't understand why I reacted the way I did at the meeting. When I told her the meeting was the 1st I heard of it she was ticked too. She said 'stand your ground', so obviously this lady is in support of Rich and I.
Rich is a very easy going guy, but I think if they keep pushing he's going to say 'take it!!!! I'm tired of the mess!!!' Then he'll wait to see how big of a mess the site turns in to.

But I know he would never agree to help with it again if they did turn it over to the girl no matter how bad they need someone to.
Cath

Shanna,
After reading that everyone on here thinks Rich and I reacted correctly, believe me....we will not lose any sleep over it. I just wanted someone else's opinion on whether I reacted childishly or not.

LeeAnne151 · « **Reply #19 on:** February 27, 2007, 08:15:36 AM »

I think it is ridiculous that they are even considering it. It is ridiculous that this mother even brought it up. What a spoiled child this must be.

El Jefe · « **Reply #20 on:** February 27, 2007, 09:21:35 AM »

If this whole thing is over a grade for class why can't she just build a separate page or pages and your husband can upload them to the site and link to it it is like a site within a site. She can get her grade, and Rich still maintains control as he should. She could build an entire site within the site and provide that link to the teacher. As far as webmastering goes there would not be a difference. For the record YOU and Your husband did not react childishly, selfishly or any other way but correctly.
Andy

Teresa · « **Reply #21 on:** February 27, 2007, 09:40:25 AM »

Ummm, my daughter is taking a web design class . . . . do you think she could take over this site for a while?

LeeAnne151 · « **Reply #22 on:** February 28, 2007, 10:55:49 AM »

livetogarden · « **Reply #23 on:** February 28, 2007, 01:18:26 PM »

Teresa....Um......Let me run that past Rich.

Cath

GAJen · « **Reply #24 on:** February 28, 2007, 03:12:50 PM »

Cath,
I have a bad headache so there will be errors in here just make the best of what you can. You know I use to design web sites for a living. Well in that profession I came across some organizations and churches who asked for a revamp. I too started from scratch and rebuilt everything. I had a church who wanted a lady to take their site over for a while and I flat out told them if you take it back you keep it. It takes way too much time and effort for people to redesign and straighten out others mess just for them to give it back screwed it up again. They had it 1 week and were calling me everyday which I stopped in a nice way of course. The worst thing a person can do is volunteer to do a site from what I've learned without a written agreement upfront.

I did some National sites and a bunch of local ones.....my contracts read half up front half upon approval. Problem was most of those people let their sites just sit there or fade out, some never finished paying their bills. I finally got disgusted and after 5 years....quit with it.

Author Topic: Your opinion needed (Read 3156 times)

GAJen