I once frequented another forum that is quite large, and full of "experts". In trying to learn about ponding, I asked many questions and got many answers...we all know the drill: lots of rocks/no rocks; bottom drain/no bottom drain; UV/no UV; submersible pump/external pump; lots o' fish/limited fish; and the list goes on. While there, I was told by one guy that I was "too lazy to build the pond the right way" and it was suggested I have strictly a water garden, and there were others who told me what equipment I "must" buy and how cheap I was being by not spending the $10-15K that I didn't have to begin with to build the pond the right way. I simply told them not to get mad at me just because I wasn't building
their pond in
my yard, and after a few more insults I left and asked to be banned so I wouldn't ever feel the urge to go back there.
It's no different with any other forum, and I'll use my parrot as an example: I've been told by the "know it all's" that I've been malnutritioning and abusing my parrot because of the life he lives. His last check up was "just about perfect" according to one of the best avian vets in southern california. But people still swear that I'm doing wrong by him...and I've left those forums as well because they don't like the fact that my low maintenance approach disputes their high maintenance attitudes. What works for me may not work for others, but does that mean I can't share what I've learned? I've owned a parrot now for over 15 years...my girlfriend thinks I'm an expert, I just tell her I'm experienced at owning one bird: mine.
The bottom line is that everyone is an expert with what they have, but very few are an expert at what everyone else has. What works for one won't work for another, and even though some people think they have all the answers it's rare that they actually do. Sadly, because of the experts who aim to shoot down everyone who doesn't do what they've done, I have added this disclaimer to my own pond site:
DISCLAIMER: The information contained herein applies to my own pond in my own yard. If you use this site to construct your pond, please understand you do so at your own risk. I assume no liability for problems you may encounter, this is simply what worked for me.
It's sad that people take things so seriously that they get all butt hurt when someone tries another approach. Where I work, we have been doing what we do for over 50 years, and believe me we are far more advanced from when our product was simply handwritten on notepad and photocopied for the customers prior to the business idea being acknowledged. Even still, I occasionally 'rock the boat' at work and we constantly make improvements that even the hardest of heads can wrap around. I'm a senior editor at work and have over 23 years in the industry, so I am expected to know what I'm doing. When asked if I think I have all the answers, or the best ideas, my general response is "God I hope not", because it is in my mindset that there has to be someone smarter than me, and if I have the best or only answers then they just don't pay me enough.
If all else fails, just remember not to rent space in your head to anyone, least of all, a name on your computer screen. As Jerry Springer would say, "until then ... take care of yourself, and each other".
