Author Topic: Love the Engish language? Check this out.  (Read 1016 times)

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Offline Jerry

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Love the Engish language? Check this out.
« on: January 28, 2009, 06:19:20 PM »


      You think American English is easy???

Generations,  locations, and ethnic differences and we are supposed to understand each other?!

Hey, we don't speak the same way, we can't even get our language right!

 

Read to the end . . . a new twist 
 

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.

2) The farm was used to produce produce .

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

4) We must polish the  polish  furniture.

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present ..

8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row .

13) They were too close to the door to close it.

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?


Let's face it - English is a crazy language.


English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.


You lovers of the English language might enjoy this .

There is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meanings than any other two-letter word, and that is 'UP.'

It's easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake UP ?  At a meeting, why does a topic come UP ?  Why do we speak UP and why are the officers UP for election and why is it UP to the secretary to write UP a report ?

We call UP our friends.  And we use it to brighten UP a room, polish UP the silver; we warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the kitchen.  We lock UP the house and some guys fix UP the old car.   At other times the little word has real special meaning.  People stir UP trouble, line UP for tickets, work UP an appetite, and think UP excuses. To be dressed is one thing, but to be dressed UP is special.

And this UP is confusing:  A drain must be opened UP because it is stopped UP. We open UP a store in the morning but we close it UP at night.

We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP ! To be knowledgeable about the proper uses of UP, look the word UP in the dictionary.  In a desk-sized dictionary, it takes UP almost 1/4th of the page and can add UP to about thirty definitions. If you are UP to it, you might try building UP a list of the many ways UP is used.  It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don't give UP, you may wind UP with a hundred or more. When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding UP   When the sun comes out we say it is clearing UP..

When it rains, it wets the earth and often messes things UP.

When it doesn't rain for awhile, things dry UP.

One could go on and on, but I'll wrap it UP, for now my time is UP, so.........it is time to shut UP!

Oh . . . one more thing:


What is the first thing you do in the morning & the last thing you do at night?    U-P

 

                         
Jerry
Northridge, California  
Zone 10


"Any women that tries to be the equal of a man, lacks ambition!"

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Offline HOWELL

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Re: Love the Engish language? Check this out.
« Reply #1 on: January 28, 2009, 08:06:23 PM »
I've just made UP, my mind. I know it's UP to me, but seriously, still Love english!!!!! o(:-).
Scott I'll miss you buddy... :(

Offline Julles

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Re: Love the Engish language? Check this out.
« Reply #2 on: January 29, 2009, 08:58:47 AM »
My father is a master at the English language, and loves playing with it.  I'm going to send this to him.

One of my French friends, when he first came over here, was well-versed in "textbook" English, but not in common useage.  One thing he said just drove him nuts was words like "up" that can be used in so many ways.  English has tons of them.

Offline Esther

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Re: Love the Engish language? Check this out.
« Reply #3 on: January 29, 2009, 09:31:03 AM »
Good list Jerry. I'm stealing/steeling it to post at another forum.

My 7 year old granddaughter brought home a spelling list to practice. My word, what a mess!! I could see that they are teaching phonics to some extent but I told her that there are some words she's just going to have to memorize.

Offline mascot

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Re: Love the Engish language? Check this out.
« Reply #4 on: February 02, 2009, 12:52:33 PM »
I'm broke and can't afford to pay attention, so you might have to lend me an ear.

 

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