Author Topic: Poll: Ponds & Spouses (Read 2907 times)

Julles · « **on:** April 02, 2009, 06:02:10 PM »

Does your spouse / partner share your love of ponding? More important, does he / she help with the maintenance?

RWinn · « **Reply #1 on:** April 02, 2009, 06:07:02 PM »

My dw does not like to have anything to do with our pond. The only thing she likes to do is sit by it on summer evenings and listen to the waterfall.

Sonny · « **Reply #2 on:** April 02, 2009, 06:14:38 PM »

Mine helps but complains about it constantly.

CT · « **Reply #3 on:** April 02, 2009, 06:21:35 PM »

My hubby has been doing most of the maintenence since I've been sick and I love him SO much for being there for me. He knows I love the fish and although he would rather not deal with them, he keeps them for me. What an awesome guy!

Kay

jw · « **Reply #4 on:** April 02, 2009, 06:33:24 PM »

My DH doesn't do anything with my pond but sit and look but he is my fish picker upper when I find them for free on Freecycle. Now I have 18 goldfish in two aquariums waiting for the weather to warm up so I can put them in the pond.
He picked up 5 for me today about 6" long each. Cool huh! Well I think so.

Loritx · « **Reply #5 on:** April 02, 2009, 07:04:01 PM »

It is MY pond!! But he will help me if I ask!!! He will climb in and rescue rocks that fell in and help with larger cleaning jobs!!

He keeps trying to build a Bridge over my stream????? I keep telling him its not needed!!!

He means well, but it would cover the entire stream!!!

PondmaninAL · « **Reply #6 on:** April 02, 2009, 07:10:08 PM »

My wife is a car person but when we moved to this house and there was already a preform in the ground that needed six little holes patched, she got interested enough to have her own little pond. She comes out to look at mine but I'm the only one to do anything with it unless I need some help. I help her with hers when she has a problem that is new to her. She knows how important my pond and plants are to me.

LeeAnne151 · « **Reply #7 on:** April 02, 2009, 07:46:13 PM »

Yes to both questions but Bob won't get online or read any books or magazines about ponding.

miguynmkoi · « **Reply #8 on:** April 02, 2009, 07:54:41 PM »

Like someone said above, "they're MY ponds!" DH loves feeding the koi. He saves feeder fish from the turtles' tank when they survive past 2 weeks without getting eaten! I have to put they back otherwise we'd have too many fish.

He doesn't do anything maintenance-wise.

I do catch him over feeding all the fish though

pegs pond · « **Reply #9 on:** April 03, 2009, 12:52:13 AM »

He didn't to start with! I had to research, buy and pay for all the stuff to build it out of my personal savings. He belly ached and moaned and groaned until he started seeing progress and fell in love with it as it got more and more completed. Now he's super proud of it and does all the maintenance for me.................now when I ask him to drag the plants up so I can tend to them he is NOT happy! We just finished it towards the end of summer last year so the plants didn't get a chance to get established, fingers crossed they will not be dead this year and if and when they bloom I know he's going to be even happier. I couldn't do it without him as I'm unable to bend over.
Peg

tweetybaby2005 · « **Reply #10 on:** April 03, 2009, 05:51:59 AM »

It was my idea to have a pond. He wasn't too into it but he told the dental hygienist that "I" was the one who wanted it bad enough that he was willing to dig it for me.

Now he loves it. Although I did most of the cleaning and maintenance of the pond, he does help a fair bit of it plus he is my plumbing guy. He did all the pipe work and mortared the waterfall together for me. I'm the one who reads up on pond stuff and he is the hands on guy. Last year we drove up to see Tracey in KC (his idea) to pick up some wakins for the pond.

You can say he has been bitten by the pond bug.

Kuan

Kat · « **Reply #11 on:** April 03, 2009, 06:14:20 AM »

Mine will build my raised ponds for me (only 1 per year though!) but doesn't take any interest in the plants, birds, blooms, fish, etc. He likes the frogs at night. If I go out of town to visit family he doesn't like to take care of the ponds & I find my water levels are really low when I get back. Plus something usually dies while I'm gone ... a fish and/or yard plants. Wish he would be more interested but whenever someone asks about the fish/ponds/lilies he talks like he knows everything while doing all the work

Hoping my kid will eventually want to participate.

Sunbeam56 · « **Reply #12 on:** April 03, 2009, 06:30:50 AM »

I didn't know ponders were supposed to have spouses!

You mean all you guys aren't single?

Pa Nancy · « **Reply #13 on:** April 03, 2009, 07:26:08 AM »

My dh says he likes them. He dug them for me, but that's as far as they will go. I would like to do some improvements on them,but it's not gonna happen. :'(

Far as maitenance he will help anytime I ask without gripe. He'll even talk to the fish when they come up to him. He even seemed happy when we heard our first toad outside last night. He just won't do anymore digging.

PondJoy · « **Reply #14 on:** April 03, 2009, 10:48:53 AM »

I think of it as "my pond" 'cause I do all the reading/research and most of the daily upkeep. He is extremely good about cleaning the skimmer filter and will do all the heavy work. I seem to always be changing/improving something related to the asthetics of the pond area and his question is always "when are we going to be done?".

He really likes the fish and the pond and we spend many days and nights by it when the weather is good.

Desertponder · « **Reply #15 on:** April 03, 2009, 11:32:13 AM »

My DH did not like my interest in ponds at all in the beginning. In fact he complained heavily. I ignored him and did ALL the work myself.
Then because I was paying so much attention to pond work he got involved but then too involved. He would do things, change things, etc. and end up making a mess and I would have to straighten every thing back out. He finally stayed out of it. Now he helps when I ask. If I need something moved, repaired, dug, plumbed, etc. he'll do it and he also like to watch and feed the fish.

landey1230 · « **Reply #16 on:** April 03, 2009, 12:55:08 PM »

Heck no. My wife says the yard belongs to me, but she claims the fruit of my labor. She says look at my roses, my apples, my lemons, my grapes, my this, my that. I do the work, she claims it. How does that work?

Indiana Karen · « **Reply #17 on:** April 03, 2009, 01:00:16 PM »

Our pond was hubby's idea. He had wanted one for a long time, then a friend of ours that owns a nursery convinced him to put one in. The friend offered to help so he could learn the process and offer pond installation at his nursery. Well, the friend lasted through lunch the first day

I will admit, I didn't want it in the beginning, but now...........its mine

Hubby helps with the bigger jobs, spring cleaning, pump problems, lighting, etc. But I kinda like to do everything else, my way.

Karen

Vickie · « **Reply #18 on:** April 03, 2009, 01:34:57 PM »

Yes bless my husband. He has dug 8 ponds and made 3 above ground ponds for me. He helps me with bringing all my plants out in the spring and putting them back inside for the winter.. I have many bananas. And he lifts my heavy lotus pots for me to sink in the winter. He is godsent. He loves the summer when it is all done and it is beautiful. He is proud of our fish.

Jerry · « **Reply #19 on:** April 03, 2009, 02:25:22 PM »

Mine like to read a book by the pond and sometimes feed the fish and turtles, but that's it.

LeeAnne151 · « **Reply #20 on:** April 03, 2009, 04:01:00 PM »

I come up with the ideas and Bob does all the work.

Esther · « **Reply #21 on:** April 03, 2009, 04:27:49 PM »

I have wanted some type of water feature for a long time. Weve dad an inground pool in the back yard for 38 years but it just didn't do it for me. About 8 years ago, I bought a preform that looked pretty good sized when I took it out of the box in the kitchen. That lasted 2 weeks. DH shoveled out a little one and my son in law, the roofer, lined it nicely. It was cute. I bought a couple of fantails, a couple comets, and a couple Koi, not knowing how they would grow. For two winters I brought in the fish to live in a 55 gallon aquarium. But then when the next summer got here the Koi had grown so much I knew they wouldn't be happy in the glass box in the house anymore. That summer we went to Alaska and got home mid August. The next thing I knew DH was driving in with a mini digger and he had a grin on his face. He dug it as big as it would go in the space we had. I shaped the bottom and ledges with the shovel. Again son in law got us the liner but disappeared by the time to put it in. LOL. I had been on AWGS forum for a couple of years so had a pretty good idea of the basic idea so bought the stock tank for the Skippy and got the Rubbermaid tubs for the filter/skimmer. Between the two of us we got everything situated and water running. It is near the front of the house.

That summer we had two decks installed at our duplex. Home Depot had over judged on some of the parts and we had boards left over, plus the trimmings. Pete then built a boardwalk around two sides of the pond with the leftovers.

So I mostly do the maintenance but then I've been retired for 5 years and he stayed working, so I have time. He helps on heavy stuff or nasty stuff if he sees me doing it. Thank goodness for that. This spring I knew I had to tackle tearing out the overgrown water plants which meant moving rocks. We had a couple of warm days a few weeks ago and he emptied the pond seeing the fish had all died in the winter and power washed and cleaned it. He got in and started tearing up root masses and moving rocks. When it was done he helped put the rocks back. I just know if he wouldn't have started it, I wouldn't have had the gumption to tackle it by myself.

So mostly he says it is my pond and that he doesn't know anything about it but that's not true. He's sorry the big fish died and we both miss them. If I have an idea for something beyond what I can do, he dives right in and helps bring about my vision.

I just know my first husband of 20 years, would not have helped in any way. He would have gotten IN THE WAY... He had a college education and was an industrial arts teacher. He was very confident, good looking and social. You'd think that type would have been good with his hands. BUT HE NEVER FINISHED ANYTHING, not even his marriage. Bad joke.

Pete is my second husband, 25 years June 21st. So you can see how lucky I am to have Pete. He's not educated, not very social, but he's good looking, hard working, thinks I'm smart, loves my family, loves, and supports me both emotionally and financially. What more can I ask?

tootsie · « **Reply #22 on:** April 03, 2009, 04:47:35 PM »

AWWWWWWWW Esther, HOW WONDERFUL for you both

When I bought the place the pond was already there. Husband thought it should be made LARGER! Next I knew it should have sand and high sides. Next I put in some Koi, but then he put in minnows? Then he put in sunfish! Then he decided to file down the sharp end of a fish hook only to cast out his fishing line and HOOK MY KOI IN THE MOUTH! He then made a wooden swing on which to sit and watch the Koi swim. He then went and bought 2 big bags of fish food(after watching me laugh at the silly fish swimming down to me to eat the food) so that HE could be the big deal feeding the fish. I mean he filled the largest bucket and flung the whole thing into the pond so he could watch the fish, SWIM AS FAST AS THEY COULD GO AWAY FROM THE BIG THING THAT JUST SLAMMED INTO THE POND!! As time went on I started potting pond plants to place around the shallow part of the pond, so then he decided to start up the old tractor and for some odd reason drive it right into the pond and while he was at it, got it stuck right in the clay. Of course he ran over about 8 of my potted plants on the way in! I think he just got a little jealous of me and the fish I used to have

pegs pond · « **Reply #23 on:** April 03, 2009, 07:16:53 PM »

Tootsie are you still married???
Peg

reddad35 · « **Reply #24 on:** April 03, 2009, 07:56:58 PM »

When I met my wife I had a lowes preform with 1 goldfish and 1 Koi. When she came to my house we would sit and watch the fish if she came at the time I fed them. After a bit she would come without warning to see feeding time. 10 15 pellets fish were happy. Next thing you know she brought a gift after calling and making sure I was home. 2 new Koi. I guess although we were just dating this was now her pond too. I was hooked, (so to speak) and so was she. We married, I moved in with her and sold my house. I sold my house after renting for a few months. I built a new pond at her/our house upon her request. (I went and grabbed my fish from my other house).
We decided to upgrade houses after being married 1 1/2 years. We bought another. We rented the other house for 2 years. I ended up filing in that pond because the renters had no use for it. At our new house we made a new and bigger pond. Of course we went and got the fish from the old house.
We then decided after a few more years to move north from Florida to Indiana. ???? Ok now that you are done yelling at me we lived here for 4 years before trying the pond again. We built a 5500-6000 gallon pond. My wife has been there every step of the way. I will tell you though she doesn't mind handing me a rock or 2 but she has never picked up a shovel. To her credit she actually vacumned the pond once. With a shop vac. when it was drained. and she was in it. I love her and she loves me and my passion for ponds. Her Passion however lies in a finished and"I can watch the show from the patio". If asked however she would help me with anything. I guess all in all she loves it but just wants me to enjoy everything about it until I need a little help. March 29th was 14 years.

JimMcD in SVAZ · « **Reply #25 on:** April 04, 2009, 08:34:58 PM »

Sunbeam56 wrote

I didn't know ponders were supposed to have spouses!
You mean all you guys aren't single?

Single? Aaaa, er, umm, Oh Yeah, single! Sure, of course, single...
My Bride isn't around anywhere is she?

Billy · « **Reply #26 on:** April 07, 2009, 05:12:40 PM »

Same Here!

Quote from: RWinn on April 02, 2009, 06:07:02 PM

My dw does not like to have anything to do with our pond. The only thing she likes to do is sit by it on summer evenings and listen to the waterfall.

livetogarden · « **Reply #27 on:** April 08, 2009, 06:49:19 AM »

My husband, Rich, does as much if not more with the pond as I do. It was a joint project from the beginning and continues to be. Last summer he built a homemade skimmer and relined the rocks around the edge of the pond so it looks more natural. I do the planting but he's the one who usually hops in the pond to place the pots. Of course part of that reason is he's 6' 7" and I'm 5' 2", obviously it's easier for him to climb in and out than it is for me to. We are both outdoors people so we built a screened gazebo when we built our pond. Most of our time during good weather is spent sitting in there eating our dinner, enjoying the pond, waterfall, birds, etc. or reading the newspaper or a good book. I don't know that I would be able to keep up with the pond on my own. We have a 50' x 100' veggie garden, if there was just 1 of us I'm not sure we could manage to keep both in good shape. And yes, I do realize how fortunate I am to have him.

Cath

Mikey · « **Reply #28 on:** April 08, 2009, 09:02:20 PM »

The fetching Mrs. Mikey loves the pond.....and the guy who maintains the pond.... Her idea of maintenance is to give names to the critters in the pond.....