Braeden's service & pix

[Esther]

Several have asked for me to show what I wrote on another forum, describing Braeden's service. I don't mean to be preachy but it is just a clear description of what occured.

The family entered the sanctuary after everyone was seated and was seated in the front two rows. Then in came the closed little white casket, lined with a pale blue quilted fabric, surrounded by 6 firefighters and Ian. Ian sat down with us and then the fire chief and his people placed the casket. They lined up facing it and they all snapped off a sharp salute and the chief barked, "Short term fire fighter Braeden Burgess, we salute you."


We sang several songs about the greatness of our God and ended with Amazing Grace. Music often touches me deeply even during normal church services and I will tear up. I didn't think I would be able to sing but I DID. As I pictured my dad singing with tears rolling down his face, I drew on his strength to sing also. There maybe was a bit more vibrato to my voice than normal. Or was it just plain shaking??? I suspect so.

Pastor asked for comments from the mourners. My nephew works for Spectrum so has clearance to enter any of the rooms there. He would visit Dawn and Braeden frequently. One day he went to visit and found Kevin with Braeden. Dawn must have had a cold so wasn't there. They all talked a while and Braeden wasn't feeling very well so mostly dozed during that time. When it came time for Jeff to leave, Braeden came to a bit and Jeff asked if there was anything he wanted. He said, "Can we pray for my mom?" Here's a little dying three year old concerned for his mom enough to ask for prayer. He knew if they prayed, his mommy would get better and be able to come back and be with him.

Several others talked, including one of Braeden's nurses. She told of the privilege that is was to be a help to Kevin, Dawn, Braeden and the kids during the past two years. She told how people came to his room to minister to them and went away having been ministered to instead. There were 12 nurses there who came an hour drive to his funeral. I was amazed.

The pastor of our church had been Kevin's pastor in his teens and had married Kevin and Dawn. He was asked to say a few words and pray. It was such a struggle for him as he has experienced laying his own stillborn grandson in the grave and now faces with his family the sadness of having just welcomed the birth of a darling little girl who has heart disease and only one kidney and it in not functioning completely.  He mentioned that he was so proud to know the Burgesses and commended them on the wonderful testimony they had displayed during the past two years.

Then a young man sang the Jeremy Camp song:
 

I try to hold on to this world with everything I have
But I feel the weight of what it brings, and the hurt that tries to grab
The many trials that seem to never end, His word declares this truth,
that we will enter in this rest with wonders anew

But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings
That there will be a place with no more suffering

[Chorus]
There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more, we'll see Jesus face to face
But until that day, we'll hold on to You always

I know the journey seems so long
You feel you're walking on your own
But there has never been a step
Where you've walked out all alone

[Chorus]

Troubled soul don't lose your heart
Cause joy and peace He brings
And the beauty that's in store
Outweighs the hurt of life's sting

I can't wait until that day where the very One I've lived for always will wipe away the sorrow that I've faced
To touch the scars that rescued me from a life of shame and misery this is why, this is why I sing

Scott has a beautiful voice and did a wonderful job presenting the music.

One of the themes that has developed during the past two years was that of Super Bub, superhero. Bub seemed especially attracted to Superman, Spidey man and the rest. We wondered if it was his subconscious way of wishing he could have super powers.

Pastor Bob wore a Super Bub t-shirt under his suit jacket and many people there either had Super Bub shirts or Superman t-shirts. In fact both Kevin and Ian wore one with their jeans. Pastor's message touched on the typical "why" that we always ask when we don't understand. He didn't know either and said we are surrounded by so many mysteries in our life and that would be just another one. But along with the mystery, he knew of a couple certainties. One was that we all were born and will die some day. So as Bub cannot come to us, but because of what God's Son did for us,  we can go to him.  The other certainty was of the love of God. He proceeded to work his way through a simple message of salvation and ended with prayer and a distinct invitation to those who needed to accept Christ as their Savior.

When we opened our eyes after the prayer, the lights had dimmed and a video was shown of Braeden throughout his short life. One of the video clips showed him last summer at the top of a little plastic slide with his hat on to keep him from sunburning. At the bottom was a kiddy pool full of water. He stands up there and I thought he would slide down nicely. NOOOO! He yells, "HIYA!!" at the top of his lungs and jumps straight down into the water, missing the slide completely. Some of the pictures were of Braeden in the hospital but most were pretty easy to view because it didn't show him sick.

There was a final prayer and they dismissed the audience back row first and worked down to the front. The immediate family was in the first two rows. The funeral home director went to the casket and opened the top. He gently folded the quilted fabric back over the edges and stepped back.  I stood up thinking we were leaving and then noticed the firefighters were standing on the other side of the aisle. The Chief stiffly approached the casket, snapped off a sharp salute again and removed one white glove and placed it on the lid. Each one of the 6 did the same, slowly and with firm determination. They then turned on their heels and marched up the aisle and out the door. Kevin asked if we would let him and Dawn and the kids have time alone with Braeden so pastor said we could say our goodbyes. I stood by the casket, staring at that little shrunken, pale, pinched face, with just a tiny fringe of hair circling his head and wondered if I dared touch him. I didn't want to make a scene so gently laid my palm on top of his cold clasped hands and whispered, "Goodbye Bub". 

We then went across the hall where the church has a huge gymnasium. It was filled with tables covered with white paper table cover. In the center of each table was a bud vase filled with yellow spring flowers, daffodils and forsythia. On each serving table was a bright colored plastic dump truck. In the bed was a beautiful floral arrangement of tulips and other flowers. The ladies had laid out a wonderful luncheon of drinks, ham buns, chips and LOTS of salads and desserts so everyone had plenty to eat. 


We were given several containers of leftovers and two dozen buns to bring home. DINNER'S READY!! I'm so glad because I didn't get to bed very early the night before and then had trouble sleeping. We had to be up at 7 as we had a court appointment at 8:30 to evict a tenant. The funeral was at 11 and we went straight there from the court. We didn't get home until 4. It was a long day and very draining. But all in all, it went well and I think the kids are doing as well as can be expected. Ian and Eliana aren't going to school the rest of the week, nor Kevin to work. They'll have some time to learn to be a normal family again for the first time in two years. They have a very different life ahead of them.

They didn't have a committal prayer at the church and didn't go to the cemetery as a group. I suspect that Kevin, Dawn and the kids went with their pastor to the cemetery and had a private one there. It is about 5 miles north of the church and is all by itself out in the country, with big trees here and there and surrounded by farmland. It is right near their favorite ice cream shop so in the summer, they'll go by it often and I'm sure will stop and remember Braeden for a few special  moments. I would like to go up today and plant some of my daffodils that are blossoming by our pool, where he had had so much fun in the water.

I didn't send flowers but did pick daffodils from my garden along side the pool. There are those little green glass blobs in the bottom of the vase and they helped to keep the stems in place. Hanging from the rafia bow is letter block beads with Braeden's name. The green crystal gems there are his birth stone. I will complete the bracelet with silver and gold ball beads for Dawn.

[Sean]

It sounds like it was a beautiful service, thank you for sharing.

Sean

[fishlipsmcgee]

It sounds like a very lovely and moving service, Esther.  Although we always worry about getting through "the day" somehow God gives us the strength.  It is the lonely days, weeks and months that follow that are tough.  Our lives are changed forever.  You know there are lots of friends here for you anytime you need us.  God bless you and your family.

[Kittyzee]

Thank you Esther for sharing your thoughts and letting me grieve with you.  A firefighter's funeral is one of the most touching, short or long term.  

A salute to you Braedon.  You fought the good fight.  Sleep well.

LuAnn

[tweetybaby2005]

What a lovely and touching service.  May God bless you and your family.

Kuan

[Ky Kim]

 I have tears streaming down my face. 

God Bless You, Braeden!

[Monica]

May God be with you.

[Bullfrog]

I'm actually at a loss for words after reading this. What can one say? You have a lot of support here Esther, God be with you and your family in the days to come.

[Joyce]

I've been speechless with grief too.  :'(
My heart is like one big bruise. 
Hugs Esther.

[Esther]

Thanks is a word that seems to simple but cannot emcompass what I feel. You have ALL been so supportive in so many different ways, I feel so helpless to express it adequately. The feeling of family that has surrounded me on this forum is something I'll never forget.

I know you are not all in agreement about my faith and I hesitated to mention it, knowing that. But I felt led to "tell it the way it was" and thank you all who do not have the same opinions, that you have supported me throughout it all without a negative word, EVER. You are the greatest.

[Desertponder]

I tend to be tougher than many women because I'm a firefighter but when I opened this thread and saw the picture with his gear and the helmet on the casket I just lost it. :'( And that was yesterday. I couldn't bring myself to post until today.
It looks like it was a very beautiful and appropriate service for Braeden. 
I love the flower arrangements in the dump trucks. Very special.
Sending strength to you and your family for this difficult time.

[ponderer]

Esther,
That is because we think YOU are the greatest. You have a knack for saying the right thing. It is hard sometimes when posting to make what is being written sound the way we want it to. 

Always enjoy your posts. Even tho I sometimes had to steel myself to read about  dear Braeden. He's in heaven now .
Bless him and your family.

Mary

[marla]

Esther, sounds like a beautiful service and tribute to one little boy that showed tremendous courage in his short life.  God Bless you and your family, I'm sure this tradgedy in everyones life will not be harmful to your family as you all seem to have great faith in God.

[Esther]

OK Shanna, what is the significance of the firefighters each putting one white glove on the casket?

[karen J]

Esther, you've been so strong throughout all this, and I'm glad Braeden is in Heaven where he has a lot of work to do there. Much of that work has already been done in the lives that he has touched. What a beautiful service. Yes, it was hard to read all this and I am on the third time and it still stings. But he has better and more important things to do now.

[Kittyzee]

Esther, I found this poem I thought might explain about the firefighters gloves:  they are our lifeline, and we never get out of a truck without them on.  The significance of the dress gloves (or one of them) being placed in or on a casket is (after the final salute) a show of respect and our final goodbye.


Firefighters Gloves

A Firefighters Gloves hold many things
From elderly arms to a kids broken swing
From the hands they shake and the backs they pat
To the tiny claw marks of another treed cat
At 2 am they are filled with chrome
From the DWI who was on her way home
And the equipment they use to roll back the dash
From the family of 6 she involved in the crash

The brush rakes in spring, wear the palms out
When the wind does a “90” to fill them with doubt
The thumb of the glove wipes the sweat from the brow
Of the face of a firefighter who mutters “What now?”

They hold inch and three quarters flowing one twenty five
So the ones going in, come back out alive
When the regulator goes; then there isn’t too much,
But the bypass valve they eagerly clutch

The rescue equipment, the ropes, the C-collars;
The lives they saved never measured in dollars
Are the obvious things firefighters gloves hold
Or, so that is what I’ve been always told

But there are other things Firefighters Gloves touch
Those are the things we all need so much

They hold back the rage on that 3 am call
They hold in the fear when you’re lost in a hall
They hold back the pity, agony, sorrow
They hold in the desire to “Do it tomorrow”

A glove is just a glove till it’s on firefighters
Who work all day long just to pull an all-nighter
And into the fray they charge without fear
At the sound of a “Help” they think that they hear

When firefighter’s hands go into the glove
It’s a firefighter who always fills it with love
Sometimes the sorrow is too much to bear
And it seeps the glove and burns deep “in there”

Off come the gloves when the call is done
And into the pocket until the next call
The hands become lonely and cold for a bit
And shake just thinking of it

And they sit there so red eyed with their gloves in their coats
The tears come so fast that the furniture floats
They’re not so brave now; their hands they cant hide
I guess it just means they are human inside

And though some are paid are others are not
The gloves feel the same when it’s cold or it’s hot
To someone you’re helping to just get along
When you fill them with love, you always feel strong

And so when I go on my final big ride
I hope to have my gloves by my side
To show to St. Peter at the heavenly gate
Cause as everyone knows, firefighters don’t wait.

~Anonymous~

[Esther]

Thanks LuAnn. I copied that poem and will send it to Kevin and Dawn.

[tweetybaby2005]

Esther, I found this on the internet about a Firefighter's Glove ceremony.

"The placing of the glove." This is an old Navy custom which began during World War I. Sailors were trained as firefighters for a fire onboard, where everyone's life was in danger.

If a sailor lost his life during a fire he was honored before his burial, first by a salute and then by placing the gloves from the right hand of the honor guards upon his body.

I first heard of this ceremony from a dear friend, Rev. Jim Van Houten, Chaplain of the Walden (NY) Fire Department. The words below are those he says at the conclusion of a line of duty death, or an active firefighter's service.

"Placing of the Glove Service" at the grave site.

In honoring our friend ____________the members of the department will remove the glove from the right hand, it's first of all the symbol of our hand of strength. It stands as a reminder of the years of service working together as firefighters as we have aided those in need.

Secondly, it represents our hand of friendship. We in the fire service have a special brotherhood a bond that ties us together. Even if we have seen this friend the day before, you will see us shaking hands in friendship.

And thirdly, this is the hand of Honor. That final salute does not end at the grave side, by placing the glove on the casket that salute remains with our friend until we meet again in the courts of Heaven as our Supreme Chief greets us with the words, "Well done my good and faithful servant, enter into my rest."

Honored for a life well lived
Honored for a Race well run
Honored with a crown well deserved

Kuan

[Desertponder]

Whew! I'm glad some of you had the answer to that one because I didn't.

Departments around here are not real big on a great deal of the traditions that many larger city departments are.
We only just got dress uniforms a little over a year ago and we don't do the gloves.
I've only seen one FF funeral around here and that was for a long retired Chief from the city depart.

[CliffandJoann]

Sorry for your loss Ester.

[Julles]

I just think it's so cool and touching that the fire department devoted so much care and attention to this little boy.  He got to ride the fire truck, and they did other things with him, and then to be at the funeral service.  That's very kind and touching.

[Esther]

Yup, they are good people. Did you notice the little outfit? It is real and has his name on the back along with the fire department's name. That helmet is real too and they said was a lieutenant's. They also gave a helmet to Ian.

[barb]

That was a very touching and beautiful service. 

[tranquility]

Sorry for you loss...you and your family will be in my prayers and thoughts...
Lawanna

[terri911]

Sorry for your loss, Esther.

Terri

[happyoutsidegirl]

Esther, I'm so sorry for this loss. I have been heart broken and feeling guilty each time I look at Bekka's pix. Only the Lord will give reliefe!

[Viv]

I'm so sorry Esther.  :'(

[Esther]

Hi Viv. Haven't seen much of you lately. How are you and your girls?

[livetogarden]

Bullfrog,
Something that came to mind when I was reading your post is that as painful as it was for you to not be able to do enough to save your daughter, thank yourself that her daddy was there at the end so she wasn't with strangers or alone.
I hope that comforts you.
Cath

[FrankJScott]

For the person inquiring about reiki the healing touch, reiki violet flame, qi energy healing, angel energy healing, lung chakra healing, sending love and healing energy,  I highly suggest this additional reading about chakra cleansing link or crystals for healing and strength, energy healing for women, four winds energy medicine, energy protection crystal, soulnar sound healing, hand energy healing, and don't forget this these details on positive energy crystals site not to mention energy medicine healing, qi gong for health and healing, quantum healing within, alternative energy healing, spiritual healing services near me, violet flame to heal body mind and soul, and don't forget this the full report about spiritual healer link which is as good as the energy cure unraveling the mystery of hands on healing, chakra practitioner near me, energy treatment, the pranic healers, spiritual journey chakra balancing, heart chakra meditations,  on top of additional reading for chakra balancing near me details alongside all barbara ann brennan healer, hands of light by barbara ann brennan, chakra cleansing, mantras for root chakra, chakra cleansing and balancing, clear my chakras, as well as this dig this for positive energy crystals info alongside all magnetic energy therapy, acupuncture chakras, energy healing 101, violet flame to heal body mind and soul, merlin energy healing, chakra healing, on top of official source on chakras in the hands forum which is about voice chakra healing, barbara brennan energy healing, chakra cleansing and balancing, white aura healing, scalar light healing, chiropractic energy healing, not to mention this her explanation for crystal for sacral chakra link alongside all solar plexus solfeggio, hands on healing bengston, energetic healing modalities, black reiki healer near me, psychic energy healing, stomach chakra healing, not to mention this his response for positive energy crystals info on top of vibrational energy healing, strongest healing crystal, energy healing childhood trauma, crystals for blocked throat chakra, cebr energy healing, energy healing for empaths, alongside all read full report on chakras in the hands blog not to mention healing all chakras, chi energy healing near me, richard gordon quantum healing, spinal energy healing, unlocking chakras, samadhi energy healing, which is also great. Finally, have a look at this weblink about crystals for healing forum with somatic energy healing, mantak chia awaken healing energy through the tao, richard gordon energy healer, new chakra healing, reiki spiritual healing near me, reiki spiritual healing,  for good measure. Check more @ Great Hints For Picking Scooter rental for theme parks c583_f1